i dont know where this is going... sometimes stupid stuff just pisses me off... actually, not stupid stuff, but stupid lazy people...
you know the guy...
sets up camp inside the squat rack (MY squat rack, by the way)... he's got a bosu, a swiss ball, a collection of dumb-bells, a jump rope, some plates, and a 25lb. kettlebell... bar removed and laying on the floor outside the rack...
no problem... whatever dude... you can do your circus tricks...
i did my warming up and moved to another rack.
and then, dude got done... packed up his bag (which i now refer to as his "douche bag")... and left... all sweaty and obviously quite proud of himself...
and he left all of his crap inside the rack. puddle of sweat in the middle of the floor, swiss ball sitting there, bosu (upside down, of course), 6 dumb bells, various plates scattered, jump rope hanging on the hooks, kettlebell... all just there for someone else to clean up.
and i thought of what a friend of mine would say, "What an asshat..."
and then i thought, "What is this dude like in the rest of his life?" There are some truths... at least things i believe are "universal" behavioral truths...
one of these "truths" is - As we behave in one relationship, we typically behave in all our relationships.
in other words, this dude was selfish, messy, childish, entitled, arrogant in the way he treated the gym and the rest of us there... he's probably this way in his relationship to his co-workers, his job, etc. - when someone isnt watching, this dude is just a selfish and entitled ass... does his "Momma" know he's like this? (actually, i bet she does, he's was probably allowed to act like this as a kid)...
i'm probably making too much about it because he was IN MY SQUAT RACK at MY NORMAL TIME... and set aside for a second that his "workout" was some b.s. made up silliness... rude, disrespectful, and above all feeling "entitled" to behave this way... we all know these types of folks, we all know these people, we see them in our work and in other places... watch folks in the gym... not just how they lift or how they work out, but when they are done, how they treat the bar, the weights, the space they use, the water fountain - are they spitting their snot it in?, do they share? do they treat you and others and the facility itself with respect and pride?
do you?
Showing posts with label entrepreneur. Show all posts
Showing posts with label entrepreneur. Show all posts
Tuesday, March 25, 2014
Friday, March 7, 2014
Fear and Lifting
So, i got under the bar... ready to squat. This week is my heaviest week in this training month. Next week i will de-load... so this week was heavy. I woke up this morning... well go farther back... this weekend, when i was planning the lifts, i started to get nervous... a little sweaty... thinking about how heavy that weight would feel... that nervous / excited / scared / even angry feeling that the thought of putting some big weight on my back engenders...
see, it's been a while
ok... back a little farther still...
not quite 8 months ago, i had both of my hips replaced... arthritis... injury... not paying attention... blah blah blah... the "why" of it... the "HOW did this happen" of it is less important than the forward movement... i had pain, a LOT of it, all the time... i limped, all the time, i couldnt get into a car without some serious gymnastics.
and now, i dont have pain at all... It is awesome. my goal now is to get back to lifting heavy weights.
so there i was... thinking about this all weekend. and the voices in my head were all about the NOISE from fears... fear of injury, fear of failure, fear of disappointment, fear of going backwards in my recovery... those voices were just relentless.
fast forward... back to the gym
and i got under the bar. heart racing. focus on proper form, footwork, bar position ... and lift it off ... small steps back ... DEEP breath ... drop slowly into the hole... good depth ... DRIVE UP ... and... it felt good, solid, strong ... so another rep... dig deep for the third ... cold sweat on the fourth... rack the bar.
the weight felt like weight... but i felt strong and solid.
i've said it before, and probably more often than i should, and i probably make if fit where it doesnt... whatever.
but, i think the bar is often a metaphor for life... those voices of fear or doubt that hit us in relationships, in our work, with our kids, in taking a chance... this is where we are tested! it is the test of our desire and our ability to do what we have committed to do despite the fears and the voices (real or in our heads). the fears are always there, talking... making the obstacles seem HUGE... heavier than we THINK we can move... and the bar is our test... it is MY test. to overcome MY fears.
even if i had fallen, had re-injured, had to "bail" at the bottom ... that matters LESS... moving the weight IS important, but getting under the bar and committing, full on is MORE important.
i feel that simply by getting under that bar, that i ... that when WE do that ... that WE are proving to ourselves that we can overcome what confronts us, that we can quiet those voices that tell us we cant, the voices that tell us we will fail, or caution us that we will be mocked... when we hear those voices, and we STILL get under the bar and willingly put all we have against that obstacle... THAT is the success... THAT is why we are here... to constantly confront our fears and to push against them either to success or to failure - and to do it again - over and over - that is the purpose... the goal... and THAT is the BAR.
dont let fear control you ... get under the bar... silence the voices ... then ... do it again ... it wont get easier, but the voices matter less.
see, it's been a while
ok... back a little farther still...
not quite 8 months ago, i had both of my hips replaced... arthritis... injury... not paying attention... blah blah blah... the "why" of it... the "HOW did this happen" of it is less important than the forward movement... i had pain, a LOT of it, all the time... i limped, all the time, i couldnt get into a car without some serious gymnastics.
and now, i dont have pain at all... It is awesome. my goal now is to get back to lifting heavy weights.
so there i was... thinking about this all weekend. and the voices in my head were all about the NOISE from fears... fear of injury, fear of failure, fear of disappointment, fear of going backwards in my recovery... those voices were just relentless.
fast forward... back to the gym
and i got under the bar. heart racing. focus on proper form, footwork, bar position ... and lift it off ... small steps back ... DEEP breath ... drop slowly into the hole... good depth ... DRIVE UP ... and... it felt good, solid, strong ... so another rep... dig deep for the third ... cold sweat on the fourth... rack the bar.
the weight felt like weight... but i felt strong and solid.
i've said it before, and probably more often than i should, and i probably make if fit where it doesnt... whatever.
but, i think the bar is often a metaphor for life... those voices of fear or doubt that hit us in relationships, in our work, with our kids, in taking a chance... this is where we are tested! it is the test of our desire and our ability to do what we have committed to do despite the fears and the voices (real or in our heads). the fears are always there, talking... making the obstacles seem HUGE... heavier than we THINK we can move... and the bar is our test... it is MY test. to overcome MY fears.
even if i had fallen, had re-injured, had to "bail" at the bottom ... that matters LESS... moving the weight IS important, but getting under the bar and committing, full on is MORE important.
i feel that simply by getting under that bar, that i ... that when WE do that ... that WE are proving to ourselves that we can overcome what confronts us, that we can quiet those voices that tell us we cant, the voices that tell us we will fail, or caution us that we will be mocked... when we hear those voices, and we STILL get under the bar and willingly put all we have against that obstacle... THAT is the success... THAT is why we are here... to constantly confront our fears and to push against them either to success or to failure - and to do it again - over and over - that is the purpose... the goal... and THAT is the BAR.
dont let fear control you ... get under the bar... silence the voices ... then ... do it again ... it wont get easier, but the voices matter less.
Monday, August 12, 2013
More Rhythms
More on Rhythms…
I've been writing about rhythms, patterns and habits quite a bit, lately… we all have them and most of us will "fall into" rhythms… they can be taught, created, programmed… and they can even be used to manipulate us by governments and corporations… mostly, though, it is about desire, understanding, and discipline. The desire to use what is really a part of our nature and to take control of it; an understanding and learning of HOW we can make patterns and rhythms consciously and to make them work for us; and finally, the discipline to do the work so that they become "auto-pilot" behaviors leading toward our objectives.
It starts with one day… one commitment… one pattern you want to create. It will take willpower, but only until you create a pattern / a habit… then the autonomic nervous system takes over.
Document it… before and after… set the expectation of a time and a place in writing… then come back to it.
Food journals… weight lifting journals… etc. - these all exist because they work… if you want to build a pattern and make it automatic, then you need to first use your will power to make it conscious and to make it happen… writing reinforces that behavior… the goal is to move from consciously making yourself execute the desired behavior to letting that become a part of your natural patterns.
I've been writing about rhythms, patterns and habits quite a bit, lately… we all have them and most of us will "fall into" rhythms… they can be taught, created, programmed… and they can even be used to manipulate us by governments and corporations… mostly, though, it is about desire, understanding, and discipline. The desire to use what is really a part of our nature and to take control of it; an understanding and learning of HOW we can make patterns and rhythms consciously and to make them work for us; and finally, the discipline to do the work so that they become "auto-pilot" behaviors leading toward our objectives.
It starts with one day… one commitment… one pattern you want to create. It will take willpower, but only until you create a pattern / a habit… then the autonomic nervous system takes over.
Document it… before and after… set the expectation of a time and a place in writing… then come back to it.
Food journals… weight lifting journals… etc. - these all exist because they work… if you want to build a pattern and make it automatic, then you need to first use your will power to make it conscious and to make it happen… writing reinforces that behavior… the goal is to move from consciously making yourself execute the desired behavior to letting that become a part of your natural patterns.
Thursday, June 6, 2013
Passionate Discipline
"Passion Trumps Everything" - Dave Tate
Sure… yes… it gets you going… Discipline gets you where you want to go.
I have been writing about plateaus and reaching sticking points or working through challenges that require change. It is all well and good… but the single thing that helps me get through these times… the one thing that I have seen that is consistent in all top performers - be they lifters or successful business people - is DISCIPLINE.
You thought I was going to say "passion", I'm sure… but here is why discipline…
Passion gets you started, it initiates the drive to do a thing, start a thing, stop doing a thing… it is the fire that starts you off… and it can fuel you when you are down, bring you back from the brink of depression… etc.
But, it is discipline gets you to stay on the path to your goal when things get hard… and it will get hard. And then it will get harder… and boring… and EXHAUSTING… so, when it hurts to even get out of bed… when that bar by itself is too daunting… when you have to empty the office garbage cans yourself… passion is not going to make that happen - discipline will. Self-discipline in the face of drudgery, tedium, exhaustion, anger, debt, doubt, fear, whatever is the distraction from doing the thing YOU KNOW YOU MUST DO to achieve your goals… to get stronger… to help your business or organization be healthier…
Discipline gets you through the pain… through the boredom… through any plateau… Discipline requires maturity… it requires action… it gets you out of bed early… it helps you stay awake when it is late…. And even when you are unable to move - discipline moves you.
When I'm interviewing folks for jobs, I try to dig in to this area. I believe that as we behave in one relationship we typically will behave that way in others. If you give up or are quick to make excuses in your workouts or diet… then you probably will on the job when stuff gets difficult. Passion will help you get started, skill will help you execute, innate ability will help you even more, but all of these are useless unless you actually DO something… consistently… Discipline will make you a star.
The most successful sales people are the ones who consistently and aggressively do the behaviors that are necessary to achieve their objectives. It may be an ugly cold call, but DOING the call with poor skill is still better than NEVER PICKING UP THE PHONE… Skill will come…
This is true in your work outs, this is true in raising your kids, this is true in having and keeping healthy relationships, and it is absolutely true in your business and work.
Sure… yes… it gets you going… Discipline gets you where you want to go.
I have been writing about plateaus and reaching sticking points or working through challenges that require change. It is all well and good… but the single thing that helps me get through these times… the one thing that I have seen that is consistent in all top performers - be they lifters or successful business people - is DISCIPLINE.
You thought I was going to say "passion", I'm sure… but here is why discipline…
Passion gets you started, it initiates the drive to do a thing, start a thing, stop doing a thing… it is the fire that starts you off… and it can fuel you when you are down, bring you back from the brink of depression… etc.
But, it is discipline gets you to stay on the path to your goal when things get hard… and it will get hard. And then it will get harder… and boring… and EXHAUSTING… so, when it hurts to even get out of bed… when that bar by itself is too daunting… when you have to empty the office garbage cans yourself… passion is not going to make that happen - discipline will. Self-discipline in the face of drudgery, tedium, exhaustion, anger, debt, doubt, fear, whatever is the distraction from doing the thing YOU KNOW YOU MUST DO to achieve your goals… to get stronger… to help your business or organization be healthier…
Discipline gets you through the pain… through the boredom… through any plateau… Discipline requires maturity… it requires action… it gets you out of bed early… it helps you stay awake when it is late…. And even when you are unable to move - discipline moves you.
When I'm interviewing folks for jobs, I try to dig in to this area. I believe that as we behave in one relationship we typically will behave that way in others. If you give up or are quick to make excuses in your workouts or diet… then you probably will on the job when stuff gets difficult. Passion will help you get started, skill will help you execute, innate ability will help you even more, but all of these are useless unless you actually DO something… consistently… Discipline will make you a star.
The most successful sales people are the ones who consistently and aggressively do the behaviors that are necessary to achieve their objectives. It may be an ugly cold call, but DOING the call with poor skill is still better than NEVER PICKING UP THE PHONE… Skill will come…
This is true in your work outs, this is true in raising your kids, this is true in having and keeping healthy relationships, and it is absolutely true in your business and work.
Thursday, November 15, 2012
Get a Coach (Mentor): Part 3
What to look for in a Coach / Mentor?
This is not a comprehensive list of characteristics, but these are the things that helped me make that choice.
Experience:
* Practical: this is really “table stakes” – someone who has real personal experience under the bar – they know what it feels like to have weight on their back…
* Certifications – external verification that they know something – are good but I really look for practical experience.
* Has “been there” so knows.
* More Experience: someone whose breadth of experience is greater than my own in order to call upon other resources outside of the primary focus.
Results:
* Performance relative to what you want to achieve. They have solid results.
* They hold you and themselves accountable for achieving the objectives.
Communication:
* Trust & Honesty
* Fact based
* Asks good, relevant questions
Problem Solver:
* Able to break things down into component parts to “rebuild”.
* Knows what the “end” should look like / feel like.
Focus:
* Focused on the problem at hand – not distracted by other activities, they are not employed in the business or at the gym to do something else. They are there to fill a role as a coach. Not another job… not their own workout… not doing something else.
Compensation:
* Trade? Money? Something – this is valuable… the quickest way to take something for granted is to not put a value on it or pay for it…
Wednesday, November 14, 2012
Get a Coach (Mentor): Part 2
I wrote about the importance of getting a coach or a mentor and I can’t emphasize that enough.
This doesn’t have to be a “forever” thing… people come into and out of your life at various times for a variety of reasons… It doesn’t have to be expensive and a good one will more than cover their cost.
But, find someone… try them out (I like to say, “Date before you get married.”)…. But find someone… ask around… hit up your network… find someone…
While you are looking for someone, you have to know what you are looking for, so make sure that you have a clear / specific objective:
o What, specifically, are you looking for in a mentor?
o What are you hoping to achieve?
o What are you asking them to help you with?
With TJ, my initial objective was simple: I was looking for someone who had the experience, time, and ability to watch me as I do these lifts to assure proper form and technique. My hope was that I would reduce injury, find my sticking points and then develop a program to target those weaknesses in order to improve my overall strength.
It has evolved over time to be more, but this is where we started.
Tuesday, November 13, 2012
Get a Coach (Mentor):
“All coaching is, is taking a player where he can't take himself.” - Bill McCartney
I mentioned previously that I have a friend who’s been coaching me / watching me when I’m lifting (powerlifts or Olympic lifts)… the last 10 months, TJ has been working with me the entire time. He’s with me several times a week and helps me with improving my range of motion, my technique, my form, etc. He doesn’t write a program, he doesn’t do nutritional stuff or that kind of thing – he is an extra set of eyes and a completely unbiased feedback system.
NOT easy for me – I don’t like to ask for help… ever… I have been lifting for more than 30 years – longer than TJ has even been alive! What does HE know? I know that even the best athletes have coaches – usually more than one, actually… I know it… but I have this ego-delusional perspective that I’m that unique character that can watch YouTube, read books, and do research so I don’t need a coach…
And I ended up injured, not getting stronger, and not able to think about how best to move forward. I “knew” these things… but I denied them… However, I’m pretty anal about writing down my numbers (weights, times, etc.) and as I was reviewing them I started talking to myself like one of my clients – stagnation, even going backwards, etc.
And so like talking to one of my clients, I told myself to get some external perspective…
So, I reached out to TJ and we started working together…
It started simply enough… I was dealing with a very specific issue – my range of motion in my hips (dislocated hip, torn labrum, etc. all led to some severe impingement)… and I needed someone else to make sure I was improving and doing the exercises correctly… however, this has evolved into a more holistic feedback mechanism.
And throughout this process, everything has improved and TJ has proven himself to be invaluable. If you want to get better at what you are doing – lifting weights, running a business, or whatever – then find yourself a coach… you are not so “special” that you don’t need this… no one is…
I mentioned previously that I have a friend who’s been coaching me / watching me when I’m lifting (powerlifts or Olympic lifts)… the last 10 months, TJ has been working with me the entire time. He’s with me several times a week and helps me with improving my range of motion, my technique, my form, etc. He doesn’t write a program, he doesn’t do nutritional stuff or that kind of thing – he is an extra set of eyes and a completely unbiased feedback system.
NOT easy for me – I don’t like to ask for help… ever… I have been lifting for more than 30 years – longer than TJ has even been alive! What does HE know? I know that even the best athletes have coaches – usually more than one, actually… I know it… but I have this ego-delusional perspective that I’m that unique character that can watch YouTube, read books, and do research so I don’t need a coach…
And I ended up injured, not getting stronger, and not able to think about how best to move forward. I “knew” these things… but I denied them… However, I’m pretty anal about writing down my numbers (weights, times, etc.) and as I was reviewing them I started talking to myself like one of my clients – stagnation, even going backwards, etc.
And so like talking to one of my clients, I told myself to get some external perspective…
So, I reached out to TJ and we started working together…
It started simply enough… I was dealing with a very specific issue – my range of motion in my hips (dislocated hip, torn labrum, etc. all led to some severe impingement)… and I needed someone else to make sure I was improving and doing the exercises correctly… however, this has evolved into a more holistic feedback mechanism.
And throughout this process, everything has improved and TJ has proven himself to be invaluable. If you want to get better at what you are doing – lifting weights, running a business, or whatever – then find yourself a coach… you are not so “special” that you don’t need this… no one is…
Wednesday, November 7, 2012
Getting Stronger
i had one of "THOSE" days today... you know the one... you get to the gym slightly off your normal time... someone is at the rack you want to use (dont they KNOW THAT IT IS MY RACK AND MY TIME!!!)... i had that day... the bar felt really heavy...the pulls felt way too hard on way too light weight... my feet wouldn't set "right"... i just couldnt hold good solid position... my back muscles just seemed to not want to fire... it was like i was moving through molasses - nothing moved quickly..
You know those days... nothing feels right and you just dont feel strong... so you just want to pack up the gear and head back home...
But you don't...
from experience you know that the NEXT time will be much better and that the times before have been "right"... so you trust in the process and move forward - slowly, ugly, forward (that's how it felt today)... so you keep moving forward...
and, strangely, THAT makes you stronger - the self-discipline that makes you keep at it, that drives you to finish the workout - to suck SOMETHING out of what feels like a waste... the decision you made to get to the gym becomes a commitment to yourself that you will not break... and that makes you stronger - KNOWING that even when it just sucks, you can still finish...
that builds your strength... your Will... i believe that the weight leaves the ground through force of will as much as through the muscles...
it's the same thing in business - there are days where things just suck - paperwork, bureaucracy, clients, employees, the competition, new federal rules, not getting paid... there are any number of things that happen that make you wish you could get back to bed... you question why you chose this in the first place... you wonder what you did wrong to deserve this... you just want to get off the wheel today...
But you don't... and you get stronger... better... more determined... just keep moving forward...
You know those days... nothing feels right and you just dont feel strong... so you just want to pack up the gear and head back home...
But you don't...
from experience you know that the NEXT time will be much better and that the times before have been "right"... so you trust in the process and move forward - slowly, ugly, forward (that's how it felt today)... so you keep moving forward...
and, strangely, THAT makes you stronger - the self-discipline that makes you keep at it, that drives you to finish the workout - to suck SOMETHING out of what feels like a waste... the decision you made to get to the gym becomes a commitment to yourself that you will not break... and that makes you stronger - KNOWING that even when it just sucks, you can still finish...
that builds your strength... your Will... i believe that the weight leaves the ground through force of will as much as through the muscles...
it's the same thing in business - there are days where things just suck - paperwork, bureaucracy, clients, employees, the competition, new federal rules, not getting paid... there are any number of things that happen that make you wish you could get back to bed... you question why you chose this in the first place... you wonder what you did wrong to deserve this... you just want to get off the wheel today...
But you don't... and you get stronger... better... more determined... just keep moving forward...
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