Put Away Your Toys!

i dont know where this is going... sometimes stupid stuff just pisses me off... actually, not stupid stuff, but stupid lazy people...

you know the guy...

sets up camp inside the squat rack (MY squat rack, by the way)... he's got a bosu, a swiss ball, a collection of dumb-bells, a jump rope, some plates, and a 25lb. kettlebell... bar removed and laying on the floor outside the rack...

no problem... whatever dude... you can do your circus tricks...

i did my warming up and moved to another rack.

and then, dude got done... packed up his bag (which i now refer to as his "douche bag")... and left... all sweaty and obviously quite proud of himself...

and he left all of his crap inside the rack. puddle of sweat in the middle of the floor, swiss ball sitting there, bosu (upside down, of course), 6 dumb bells, various plates scattered, jump rope hanging on the hooks, kettlebell... all just there for someone else to clean up.

and i thought of what a friend of mine would say, "What an asshat..."

and then i thought, "What is this dude like in the rest of his life?" There are some truths... at least things i believe are "universal" behavioral truths...

one of these "truths" is - As we behave in one relationship, we typically behave in all our relationships.

in other words, this dude was selfish, messy, childish, entitled, arrogant in the way he treated the gym and the rest of us there... he's probably this way in his relationship to his co-workers, his job, etc. - when someone isnt watching, this dude is just a selfish and entitled ass... does his "Momma" know he's like this? (actually, i bet she does, he's was probably allowed to act like this as a kid)...

i'm probably making too much about it because he was IN MY SQUAT RACK at MY NORMAL TIME... and set aside for a second that his "workout" was some b.s. made up silliness... rude, disrespectful, and above all feeling "entitled" to behave this way... we all know these types of folks, we all know these people, we see them in our work and in other places... watch folks in the gym... not just how they lift or how they work out, but when they are done, how they treat the bar, the weights, the space they use, the water fountain - are they spitting their snot it in?, do they share? do they treat you and others and the facility itself with respect and pride?

do you?

Fear and Lifting

So, i got under the bar... ready to squat. This week is my heaviest week in this training month. Next week i will de-load... so this week was heavy. I woke up this morning... well go farther back... this weekend, when i was planning the lifts, i started to get nervous... a little sweaty... thinking about how heavy that weight would feel... that nervous / excited / scared / even angry feeling that the thought of putting some big weight on my back engenders...

see, it's been a while

ok... back a little farther still...
not quite 8 months ago, i had both of my hips replaced... arthritis... injury... not paying attention... blah blah blah... the "why" of it... the "HOW did this happen" of it is less important than the forward movement... i had pain, a LOT of it, all the time... i limped, all the time, i couldnt get into a car without some serious gymnastics.

and now, i dont have pain at all... It is awesome. my goal now is to get back to lifting heavy weights.

so there i was... thinking about this all weekend. and the voices in my head were all about the NOISE from fears... fear of injury, fear of failure, fear of disappointment, fear of going backwards in my recovery... those voices were just relentless.

fast forward... back to the gym

and i got under the bar. heart racing. focus on proper form, footwork, bar position ... and lift it off ... small steps back ... DEEP breath ... drop slowly into the hole... good depth ... DRIVE UP ... and... it felt good, solid, strong ... so another rep... dig deep for the third ... cold sweat on the fourth... rack the bar.

the weight felt like weight... but i felt strong and solid.

i've said it before, and probably more often than i should, and i probably make if fit where it doesnt... whatever.

but, i think the bar is often a metaphor for life... those voices of fear or doubt that hit us in relationships, in our work, with our kids, in taking a chance... this is where we are tested! it is the test of our desire and our ability to do what we have committed to do despite the fears and the voices (real or in our heads). the fears are always there, talking... making the obstacles seem HUGE... heavier than we THINK we can move... and the bar is our test... it is MY test. to overcome MY fears.

even if i had fallen, had re-injured, had to "bail" at the bottom ... that matters LESS... moving the weight IS important, but getting under the bar and committing, full on is MORE important.

i feel that simply by getting under that bar, that i ... that when WE do that ... that WE are proving to ourselves that we can overcome what confronts us, that we can quiet those voices that tell us we cant, the voices that tell us we will fail, or caution us that we will be mocked... when we hear those voices, and we STILL get under the bar and willingly put all we have against that obstacle... THAT is the success... THAT is why we are here... to constantly confront our fears and to push against them either to success or to failure - and to do it again - over and over - that is the purpose... the goal... and THAT is the BAR.

dont let fear control you ... get under the bar... silence the voices ... then ... do it again ... it wont get easier, but the voices matter less.

More Rhythms

More on Rhythms…

I've been writing about rhythms, patterns and habits quite a bit, lately… we all have them and most of us will "fall into" rhythms… they can be taught, created, programmed… and they can even be used to manipulate us by governments and corporations… mostly, though, it is about desire, understanding, and discipline. The desire to use what is really a part of our nature and to take control of it; an understanding and learning of HOW we can make patterns and rhythms consciously and to make them work for us; and finally, the discipline to do the work so that they become "auto-pilot" behaviors leading toward our objectives.

It starts with one day… one commitment… one pattern you want to create. It will take willpower, but only until you create a pattern / a habit… then the autonomic nervous system takes over.

Document it… before and after… set the expectation of a time and a place in writing… then come back to it.

Food journals… weight lifting journals… etc. - these all exist because they work… if you want to build a pattern and make it automatic, then you need to first use your will power to make it conscious and to make it happen… writing reinforces that behavior… the goal is to move from consciously making yourself execute the desired behavior to letting that become a part of your natural patterns.

Passionate Discipline

"Passion Trumps Everything" - Dave Tate

Sure… yes… it gets you going… Discipline gets you where you want to go.

I have been writing about plateaus and reaching sticking points or working through challenges that require change. It is all well and good… but the single thing that helps me get through these times… the one thing that I have seen that is consistent in all top performers - be they lifters or successful business people - is DISCIPLINE.

You thought I was going to say "passion", I'm sure… but here is why discipline…

Passion gets you started, it initiates the drive to do a thing, start a thing, stop doing a thing… it is the fire that starts you off… and it can fuel you when you are down, bring you back from the brink of depression… etc.

But, it is discipline gets you to stay on the path to your goal when things get hard… and it will get hard. And then it will get harder… and boring… and EXHAUSTING… so, when it hurts to even get out of bed… when that bar by itself is too daunting… when you have to empty the office garbage cans yourself… passion is not going to make that happen - discipline will. Self-discipline in the face of drudgery, tedium, exhaustion, anger, debt, doubt, fear, whatever is the distraction from doing the thing YOU KNOW YOU MUST DO to achieve your goals… to get stronger… to help your business or organization be healthier…

Discipline gets you through the pain… through the boredom… through any plateau… Discipline requires maturity… it requires action… it gets you out of bed early… it helps you stay awake when it is late…. And even when you are unable to move - discipline moves you.

When I'm interviewing folks for jobs, I try to dig in to this area. I believe that as we behave in one relationship we typically will behave that way in others. If you give up or are quick to make excuses in your workouts or diet… then you probably will on the job when stuff gets difficult. Passion will help you get started, skill will help you execute, innate ability will help you even more, but all of these are useless unless you actually DO something… consistently… Discipline will make you a star.

The most successful sales people are the ones who consistently and aggressively do the behaviors that are necessary to achieve their objectives. It may be an ugly cold call, but DOING the call with poor skill is still better than NEVER PICKING UP THE PHONE… Skill will come…

This is true in your work outs, this is true in raising your kids, this is true in having and keeping healthy relationships, and it is absolutely true in your business and work.

Plateaus

It is a natural part of any process where continuous growth is the desired goal… you reach the period of time where your strength improvements and increases seem to STOP! PRs are not happening as often as they had been… you are stuck…

in your business it can look like a shift in the competitive landscape, that year-over-year growth has slowed or "flat-lined"… GASP!

In the last blog I talked a little about preparing yourself for these periods in your lifting and in your business by "teaching" your organization and training your body to get good and confident with change. It is important that change be something you plan on and prepare for - NOT in anticipation of avoiding BUT to condition the body and the organization so that WHEN CHANGE COMES the body and the business can both react in a healthy way. The time to train for this is BEFORE it becomes a necessity… there is an ancient proverb that tells us that "The time to dig a well is not when you are thirsty." It is very true… so, expect change, train for variation, anticipate and prepare for it… it will come…

And yet, no matter what, you will reach a point where any improvement is a struggle… where even maintaining status quo is a struggle … plateaus do happen… it is natural… you can sit inside this space for a LONG time - these are the guys who come to the gym and have been doing the same workouts, the same way, with the same weight for years… and years… you can usually find them using the hamstring curl machine.

The joy I get from lifting weights is the sense that progress is potentially endless - limited only by my will and my muscles… there is always a little more to do.

Plateaus are tough for me. My psychology is such that my first reaction is to press against the wall and lean in… harder and harder… it still is, but as I've matured I have learned that at those moments I need to take a step back, reassess, adjust, and start working on similar movements in a different way or work on the simple movements inside of the compound movements - find the "weak link" and press to strengthen that…

In business, you can do the same approach. Break the "compound" complex processes or systems in to their simplest components, apply metrics around time, expense, revenue, etc…. Break it down… find the opportunities to improve and focus improvements there.

Being an Apprentice

So I wrote about some of the characteristics I was looking for in finding a good mentor / coach and I was going to start writing about how to be “coachable” or to be in a state of mind where you can receive guidance, feedback, direction, learning etc. as we work to improve and to master something – in my case, it is my current process of working on the deadlift… and a whole lot of other things i'm working on....

Well, there are 2 new books out that cover this far better than I could…

These are by two of my favorite modern authors: Robert Greene (http://powerseductionandwar.com/blog/) and Tim Ferriss (http://www.fourhourworkweek.com/blog/)

Robert Greene looks at the historical perspective of becoming a master of something in his book “Mastery”. When you think about folks who become great, it doesn’t just “happen”… they spend years learning under others…

In “The Four Hour Chef”, Ferriss looks at how to become a life-long “learner”…

In his blog, Ferriss actually takes some pieces from Greene’s book, which is just pretty cool:
http://www.fourhourworkweek.com/blog/2012/11/12/the-magic-of-apprenticeship-a-how-to-guide/

So, here is the teaser for Greene’s book:
https://www.youtube.com/watch?feature=player_embedded&v=bNiAADUh0FY

and the teaser for Ferriss’:
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=1Z-fkHUkCPs

I highly recommend either… but like my wife’s grandpa “Boppy” used to say, “I like either, but I’ll take both.”

Get a Coach (Mentor): Part 2

I wrote about the importance of getting a coach or a mentor and I can’t emphasize that enough.

This doesn’t have to be a “forever” thing… people come into and out of your life at various times for a variety of reasons… It doesn’t have to be expensive and a good one will more than cover their cost.

But, find someone… try them out (I like to say, “Date before you get married.”)…. But find someone… ask around… hit up your network… find someone…

While you are looking for someone, you have to know what you are looking for, so make sure that you have a clear / specific objective:
o What, specifically, are you looking for in a mentor?
o What are you hoping to achieve?
o What are you asking them to help you with?

With TJ, my initial objective was simple: I was looking for someone who had the experience, time, and ability to watch me as I do these lifts to assure proper form and technique. My hope was that I would reduce injury, find my sticking points and then develop a program to target those weaknesses in order to improve my overall strength.

It has evolved over time to be more, but this is where we started.

Parts is Parts

One of the coolest things about weightlifting – well, for me – that keeps me coming back and never really being bored, is that there is always room for improvement… when you first start lifting weights the goal is to push or pull more and more weight… and then you realize that the pursuit of greater strength and pursuing the strongest your body can be is not merely in the amount of weight that is moved but it is in proper body position (foot position, knees, hips, shoulders, spine, neck, head position, etc. etc.), muscular engagement (core, back, chest, blah blah) and in the consistency of movement.

In fact, ignoring position, muscle engagement, and movement will often lead to injury and will always prevent the body from achieving its potential. This is where we get “stuck”. When we are young, we just want to see how much we can move... FORM BE DAMNED! I’ve just continued to do that – whatever means necessary to pull weight… and I have been stuck.

In January of this year, I was doing a deadlift and saw myself in the mirrors… back curved, shoulders wrapping forwards, “turtle” head poking up and out, butt tucked under… no wonder even light weight was getting harder to move. Even at 49, I was acting like all I had to do was just pull harder!! Force of WILL to make that bar move!! What I’ve learned since is that, If we want to do more… push beyond our current plateaus, then returning to refining and improving our position, movement, muscle engagement by breaking down the lift into smaller stages and identifying “problems” …

So, the last 9 or 10 months have been really hard for me.

I have been breaking down my lifts into the component parts… making sure i can see myself from the side and in front… I’ve been watching my lift and feeling what good form is, taking note of where I’m strong and really understanding where I’m weakest. I’ve been doing little sets of things like straight legged deadlifts, snatch grip deadlifts, “Dimmel” deadlifts, front squats, good mornings, etc. etc. focusing on great form and body position, going through the dialogue of engaging my muscles (hey, it helps me to “talk” to my core and my traps, etc.). I don’t do a lot of weight on these, just enough to work that “space” directly. I even dropped the weight on my heavier days to a place I could lift it without compromising the form… so I had to reduce my “max” for a period of time.

That was hard… was I getting “weaker”… at my age, losing strength is a hard thing to “make up”… the conversation internally around the paranoia of falling backwards is consuming… the ongoing challenge to part of how I have defined myself – I lift heavy weight – even though I KNOW no one but me really cares…

This was a big step for me - taking the time to work on the body’s position and allowing the proper movement to become the focus… and giving myself permission to let the weight itself become secondary. In that time, I’ve gotten stronger, hurt “less” and felt overall better… and in the last few weeks I’ve returned to my previous max… and I still struggle daily with letting it go.

When I work with start-ups or businesses where the owner and the founder have reached a “plateau” or are stuck or if the business is starting to fail or fall backwards, I go through a very similar process… we take apart all the steps and stages of the business or of key processes (usually, we end up looking at all the processes) and start to review where there are potentially some deviations from “best practices” often it is the result of a “short-term” work around that has become “how we do things”. I become the mirror and as they go through their “world” I reflect back where there may be room for improvement.

Often, like in lifting, this means focusing on smaller steps inside of a process in order to get stronger (better, faster, or eliminating… whatever) at the weakest places. I work directly with the folks responsible for those aspects of the business. Sometimes it is a lack of training, sometimes just a bad habit, sometimes laziness… Often it is because the boss has only focused on “get me that number” rather than “what do we need to get better”. It is hard to take a step back… it is difficult to set aside the “end result” to work in the steps (even if that end result is getting smaller or is stuck while the competition is growing).

When we start out, it is easy to just “muscle through” to push no matter how “ugly” to the end result… I will work on doing this right later, I need to get this out… but usually that “later” never gets attention… or worse, it becomes “it has always worked in the past” or “we’ve always done it this way”. These become mental barriers to which we become emotionally attached. It is hard to break these down.

It is difficult to set aside how we have defined ourselves for so long… but to progress, for things to improve, for business to survive, it requires an ongoing focus on defining and then pursuing perfection in movement, in position, and in the proper engagement of all resources.

Put Your Hands On The Bar!

The other day, i was coaching a client about her business and we were discussing next steps... her fears, the obstacles between her and that next objective... and i started thinking about my powerlifting coach, Doctor Johnson (we all called him Doc)...

i was maybe 18 years old, weighed about 145lbs... this was my first real weightlifting training - i was on the powerlifting team... Doc was our coach (he was strong as hell, late 50s, a professor of biology)... it was my turn on the bench press... i was about to press 225 which for me had become a barrier - not the "pounds" per se - in fact i was doing relatively easy reps with 215, so 225 shouldve been nothing... shouldve been, but this was a move to 2 "big plates" on each side of the bar - that was what was playing in my head... i had never tried 225, but it should have been an easy lift... but moving up to the 2 plates felt HUGE... so i pulled my belt tight... sat on the bench... breathed heavily... started to lay back... stood up... shook out my shoulders... sat back down... went through the inventory of foot placement... etc. reached for the bar... then sat back up - it just didnt "feel" right... i did this process a 3rd time... my "getting set" stuff... in my head was "dude, 2 PLATES! You've NEVER done this! What if i DO it? What if i DONT? blah blah blah... doubt fear everything has to be in the perfect spot... ahhh!!!"

i started to go through the process a 5th time when from the squat rack came Doc's voice, "PUT YOUR HANDS ON THE BAR AND LIFT THAT!" immediately, the head voices stopped, i sat down, laid back, didnt think about where my feet etc. were (they were in the right spots, of course, Doc had drilled it into us... the muscle memory was deep) and so, i put my hands on the bar... and i pushed it solidly... the flood gates opened and quickly pushed my PR over and over...

In fact, the head games didnt happen again until i got to 315 (3 plates on each side) - but on my 1st shot, i wrote OVER my b.s. and had my mantra playing in my head: Doc's voice saying over and over "Put Your Hands On The Bar and Lift That!"

i was so caught up in the game of "getting ready" and making sure everything was right... and messing with my OWN head on the plates... Doc's voice cut through all that noise and gave me permission to take the next step... to take the next action necessary to achieve the objective - "Put Your Hands On The Bar..." - everything else fell in to place; my feet knew where to go... my body KNEW what to do next - my head needed to get out of the way and sometimes merely doing the next thing, no matter how simple, is the hardest thing to do... i let my head, my fears, my doubts take over vs. just putting my hands on the bar...

So... there i was with my client, hearing all of the "noise" of fears, over-complications, doubt, etc. - and i thought, "Put Your Hands On The Bar..." - we identified the next simple step in building her business and i said, "Do That... and call me when you are done." She did... and she later told me that the flood gates opened for other things that she and her partner needed to get done that they hadnt taken the time to start... They KNEW what to do and HOW to do it... cutting through the head noise by merely taking the next step...

When you are stuck - Put Your Hands On The Bar...

Moving Things

Anyone who knows me knows i love to lift weights... that i'm very passionate about lifting weights. there is something very "pure" about lifting weights... Henry Rollins said it best in this message a while ago...

For me... lifting weights is the lens through which i see life... it's one of those things that helps me create metaphors for my life... my coaching... my consulting... how i approach a business or a person... etc. etc.

And i really do believe that everyone can benefit by some sort of weight lifting / resistance movement.

It will change who you are...

Honestly, i think that anything that one is passionate about can be used as a metaphor for life... it is kinda why we become passionate about something. Anthropologists talk about myths as stories we to create to help us explain why things happen ("reality") and to help us deal with how things work in "reality". For me, weight lifting is a lens that distorts to a certain extent but helps me clarify as well...

The greatest relationship i see connecting weights to life is that moving / lifting weights is all about change: change in the micro by moving X pounds Y distance over Z time... change in the macro as i get stronger or get injured or realize i can... or cant move something.

Change... the underlying principle of life... it is growth... it may be progression... but change always happens and learning to understand HOW i can impact or direct that change but KNOWING that change is going to happen and through lifting weights i learn how to deal with it.